Madden Week 1 Report 2005

Sep. 13, 2005 -John Madden here and let me tell you about your fantasy football league games.

Well ladies week one is finally over. For all the new guys in this league, I have a tradition that most of the guys that I have been playing fantasy football with for the last 4-5 years know about.

I do a weekly Madden Report. Yes, John Madden breaks down our games and even gives out awards. So do not take the criticism to hard because next week you could be awarded the Team of the Week Award.

First let me say thank God football season is here. Thank God Madden 2006 is out and is a great game. The BUCS, COWBOYS, STEELERS and PATRIOTS all looked good. The damn JETS looked like shit.

Now let me, John Madden, start the Playmakers Fantasy Footbal Maddenl Week 1 Report: Going into the draft was a lot of concern. The League was formed by Cutthroat Pirates, with experienced owners such as Terror Squad, New York Knights, Gang Green, Bartow Ford, and Boston Beer Works. The rookie owners or first time with a live draft was Detroit Latin Stars, Superdestroyers, SUKMYDITKA, and Daddy Mo Bucs. Daddy Mo Bucs started the fun with the name Daddy Mo Bucs and then picking every player twice ending up with a mouth full of dicks.

Superdestroyers had trouble early on in the draft picking Jake Plummer and trying to figure out what a slot player was, which he still has no clue. These two teams were voted by the other eight owners to play in this years Toilet Bowl.

Now with week one over lets see how each team did and how the draft picks went.
Boston Beer Works: 83
New York Knights: 86

Boston Beer Works had the first pick in the draft and he selected Ladainian Tomlinson. Sorry bro, you got your first lost, but you have a good team and will rebound. New York Knights very nice, you got your first win. A very good close game.

Gang Green: 86
Detroit Latin Stars: 68

Gang Green very nice on your first win. Both teams are good, Detroit Stars did very well in the draft and should make the playoffs this year.

SuperDestroyers: 96
Terror Squad: 89

Well, Well Superdestroyers said Fuck you all and your vote. Superdestroyers took it out on Terror Squads ass. Superdestroyers may not know what a slot player is but he knows what a win is. Terror Squad you make have taken his place in the Toilet Bowl after that game.

Daddy Mo Bucs: 66
Bartow Ford: 71

Well the sorriest team in the league with the lowest points goes to Daddy No Points. It seems that shit talking you did about Bartow Ford only proved that you will be going to the Toilet Bowl. Hey DMB, Bartow Ford called and they want their money or their car back it seems you don’t have enough points to pay it off. Way to go Bartow Ford walk into the draft unprepared and still walk out a winner.

SUKMYDITKA: 129
Cutthroat Pirates: 93

Well a first time owner, who was unsure about the draft is the team of the week. Nice going SUKMYDITKA with a 129 points. Don’t worry Cutthroat Pirates will see you again. Both of these teams are good, besides 93 points was the third best score this week. McNabb and T.O. won’t get beat to many times like they did this week. However SUKMYDITKA is the team to beat, he may have the best team out there. But Cutthroat Pirates will get their first win against Daddy Mo Bucs this week.

Well ladies it is time to hand out the Madden Awards for Week One:

Team of the Week: SUKMYDITKA 129 points
Player of the Week: (Tie) Kerry Collins and Willie Parker both with 26 points
Game of the Week: (Tie) Boston Beer Works: 83 -VS- New York Knights: 86 (-3 pts) SUKMYDITKA: 129 -VS- Cutthroat Pirates: 93 (Pirates were down 64 pts before Monday nights game)
Def of the Week: (Tie) Bills and Colts both with 21 points
Most Improved Team: Superdestroyers with 96 points and a win over Terror Squad
The Shit Team: Daddy Mo Bucs 66 points (lowest points scored)

Remember ladies, IT'S IN THE GAME